Watamote – 08

Hard to believe she’s related to Tomoko.

This week Watamote brings the pain in the form of an adorable little cousin. Going by “Kii-chan”, Tomoko’s cousin apparently looks up to her as an older sister figure. So as you can imagine, things don’t go well for our heroine.

Cool and Mature

Onee-chan, kakkoii~

Cool and mature is the name of the game. Because that’s how Tomoko wants Kii-chan to see her. Having such a pitiable life, she’s gotta at least have one person who actually admires her, doesn’t she? To this end, she indoctrinates her little cousin with a false image of herself. As far as Kii-chan knows, onee-chan is in a steamy relationship with an older guy and they regularly engage in lewd acts. But of course, they stop just short of doing the deed because Tomoko’s still only in junior high. That would just be criminal, y’know? Well, that was last year. Now Kii-chan is in junior high and Tomoko is in high school, so it’s time to up the ante. First Tomoko reaches out to her bff Yuu-chan. Because who better to consult about being slutty than a real slut? Yeah, that’s clearly more of Tomoko’s twisted reality again. All popular girls are sluts. Even though she desperately wants to become like them. And forget about the fact that Yuu-chan remains her only friend. She’s just another slut because she’s the “success story” that Tomoko couldn’t be.

Look out, it’s the slut cadets!

Of course, it would be too easy if Yuu-chan were to teach Tomoko the ways of the slut. So instead of helping her friend she’s busy out on a trip to the beach with her fellow sluts. And here I again wonder why our heroine didn’t consult her friend earlier about becoming slutty popular. But I guess the answer is staring us in the face; there’s a massive disconnect between her desires and her views. Until she reconciles her desire to be popular and her scorn for popularity, she can’t progress. Not that this will ever happen. Anyway, with plan A a failure, Tomoko proceeds to plan B; buy slutty clothes at the local slutty clothing store to look the part. On the way she encounters grade school slut cadets squabbling over cute clothing! Stunned but nevertheless undeterred by this horrific sight, Tomoko completes her mission and buys herself a set of fashionable clothing.¹ The new outfit helps, but unfortunately it’s not enough to turn a regular girl into a genuine slut. So Tomoko seals the deal by giving herself hickies. Yeah… More on that later.

Boyfriend Problems

Tomoko’s lucky day?

Skipping ahead, Kii-chan arrives and the cousins go out to the library. There, Tomoko runs into none other than the kind-hearted guy who left her an umbrella on that fateful rainy day. And here we really see how she digs herself into a hole. Here’s a guy who actually goes out of his way to say hello, and she can’t even strike up a conversation, let alone introduce herself properly? If he gets your name wrong the first time, just correct him for heaven’s sake! Especially if you’re thinking of him as boyfriend material! And it’s even worse that Tomoko does realize how painful it would be for him to constantly call her Momoko if they do get in a relationship. Also, if you really want the guy you have to at least make some effort yourself! He’s gone so far as to walk over and chat you up. Don’t just let the conversation die! That stretch of awkward silence was so painful to watch considering this is perhaps the closest Tomoko has ever come to interacting properly with a guy in her entire life.

Nope.

Sure, to be fair she has some very obvious and serious problems with interacting socially; we’ve previously seen that she’s barely even able to say goodbye to a friendly teacher. But this was a juicy opportunity that literally just dangled itself enticingly in front of Tomoko and she still missed it. I’d call her retreat from reality into her delusions when Kosaka told her “see you later” the icing on the cake of the whole ordeal. But when the cake is made of mud it doesn’t mean much. Fortunately, it’s not all so bad after all, because later on Kosaka is suggested to already have a girlfriend or a girl he’s interested in. So anything Tomoko might have done would probably have been fruitless anyway and serve only to delay the inevitable blow. Mix in Kii-chan’s innocent(?) meddling and things go down the drain completely.

Motherly Love

A needed wake-up call.

That said, let’s get back to those hickies. In her endeavors, Tomoko realizes that she unfortunately can’t give herself one on her neck. Cue mom conveniently stepping in with the vaccuum for some summer cleaning. Yeah, this won’t end well. A few moments and a hilarious near-death experience later, Tomoko is covered in “hickies” only for mom to walk in again. When she gets upset as any good mother should, Tomoko tries a new one by snapping back at her.² Let’s just say mom is not impressed.

As usual, this ends up being yet another bad day for Tomoko. Not only does she fail miserably to impress Kii-chan, she even manages to make the impressionable girl lose all faith in her onee-chan. And to rub salt into the wound, the positions are reversed by the end of the episode, with Kii-chan looking down on Tomoko as a pathetic dog instead. Which, she truthfully is. Oh Tomoko. How much lower can you possibly sink?

¹Note: fashionable, not slutty.
²The oxygen deprivation must have seriously impaired her judgement.

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