So who wants to see lolis playing with balls?
Aaah, summer season has started already. There’s Blood-C, there’s the other Reibai Sensei lookalike anime, and then there’s…Ro-Kyu-Bu! Hhmmm, maybe not really a good list to start the weekend, but maybe the other anime that will come out next week/this Sunday will be good. Just…GIVE ME NATSUNO AND NURA NAO! T________T
Ro-Kyu-Bu is a basketball anime. With little girls. Yup, LITTLE GIRLS. Let’s start from the beginning. The new coach Subaru, a high schooler, comes into the auditorium, only to find five… FIVE little maids welcoming him with tempting words such as “Master” and “Onii-chan.”
No, they’re not paid to do that. It’s FREE. No, it’s not like that either. They just want to give a good impression to their new bishie coach, and I bet it’s not working. Let’s rewind first, shall we?
He likes ’em little girls
Subaru is coaching little girls not because he wants to, but because he’s forced by his sister, the advisor of the Loli Basketball Club. Subaru was in his school’s basketball club, but his club got suspended for one year for the most retarded reason: the club president has hots for the club advisor’s five years old daughter. EW MAN, EW. Since he claims that he’s not into little girls (yeah right), his sister asks him as a replacement since she knows nothing about basketball. Subaru’s sister is so nice, if he refuses to coach the Loli Club for three days, she won’t blackmail him to show the whole world (internet) his letter to his mom when he was small. Thus, Subaru sets forth to teach the Loli Basketball Club.
The first day of the coaching is bad. Well, not really bad. It’s just the tall girl Airi starts crying when Subaru tells her that she’s tall. She gets really depressed if someone tells her that she’s tall/big, so the glasses girl tells Subaru not to say that again. So, the first day is all about Airi crying and wailing about her height. While they’re cleaning up the field though, Tomo (the short pink-haired girl) shoots the ball just for fun, and Subaru sees her glowing as she shoots the ball. Of course, she dunks it in.
Oh god, my pervy brain can’t take these kind of sentences
Lolis: They glow when they play with balls. AND they can sparkle without wanting to
The second day isn’t so bad. Subaru is able to recognize the plus and minus of the girls as he teach the basics of the game to them, and the practice goes smoothly. Over-excited Miho asks him whether they can win prefectural competition in three days or not. Realistic Subaru strikes Miho’s heart as he tells her that winning in three days is IMPOSSIBLE. Miho, not wanting to face reality, runs off crying. And that’s how the second day ends. Oh wait, let’s not forget that someone threatened Subaru not to coach the Loli Club.
“Bitch, Subaru is mine!”
This is what happens when you fight a loli: her fans threaten you
Finally it’s the third day, and it seems like Subaru just can’t wait to get it over with. Just as Subaru is about to enter the auditorium, five little boys stop him because they wants to talk to him about “something.” Seems like Subaru is gonna get beaten up by a bunch of shoutas. xD
Next Episode: Shouta Power Rangers vs. Loli Basketball Coach
Her speciality is passing around balls
Sad flashback. Everybody start crying NOW!
I WANT A CUTE CHAT LIKE THIS TOO
“All right, Subaru, now pick your uke!”
I don’t know what the fuck made me watch this junk. The first episode is just so bad I really want to hurl every time I see the little kids. The problem is, the kids are just EVERYWHERE. This is because I don’t like little kids in the first place, so watching something where ¾ of the characters are little kids is a torture for me. Yet at the same time I can’t help laughing my ass off every five seconds too because gosh the lines the little kids say are just either pornographic-sounding (for me of course. It’s a fact that my brain is a little bit on the perverted side) or too mushy or fluffy to the point where I keep laughing every time I listen to them talking.
What I don’t get is how the girls are elementary kids. Like, really? There is wide range of age, and they just have to choose the sixth graders? Why WHY would you choose little kids? And why the kids don’t act like little kids AT ALL? Why is Airi’s boobs BIGGER than mine, and she’s still in the sixth grade!? And I already graduated from high school too! And-and-and how the hell do these kids know things such as sexy maids and the word “onii-chan”!? Why are the little kids so dramatic!? Is Miho having too much hormones? WHY ARE THE LITTLE KIDS NOT ACTING LIKE LITTLE KIDS!?
And as for the story… I don’t really watch sport anime, so I’m not going to say anything about the sport part. But the story is such a typical slice of life-ish story. I’m pretty sure that the girls joined the basketball club for Tomo’s sake. And as for winning the prefectural competition, maybe the club will be disbanded if they don’t win? Or maybe Tomo is going to leave in three days? Maybe it’s the first one, since Tomo still needs to be there for the rest of the episodes. Now, for the characters. Subaru is all right, but he’s a little bit emo. He gets depressed easily when it comes to basketball and refuses to play because of the club’s suspension. I don’t know what his problem is, but he could’ve played normally instead of sulking around. My loli antenna tells me that Tomo will have a crush on him though. Maybe it’s going to be like Until Death Do Us Part? xD As for the lolis, like I said before, I don’t like how they don’t act like accordingly to their age. They’re too mature for sixth graders. I like Hana though. The air of innocence around her is so moe! That’s the kind of little kids I want, cute and innocent. But not the ones that flip out their shirts (>.<). I don’t like the fan-service they show either. It’s not that I don’t mind that kind of service, but they’re little kids! Why would you have that kind of boob-fondling fan-service on little kids!? What if a pedobear is watching this anime!? And I swear, I SWEAR, sometimes the girls’ heads are so huge in some of the scenes, I thought that they’re going to fall down because of it. Animation fail orz. And the little boys lol, they look so ghey with their big heads and beautiful faces. Last thing, why do the adults look like little kids too? Seriously, everything here looks so loli/shota.
I am soo not continuing this thing. Not even for the sake of the bishie Subaru. Or HanaKawa. I’m not liking the story, and I don’t like sports at all. The fan-service on the little kids is too much for me, because I’m not into shota/loli. Also, I can’t take those little kids. I. Just. Don’t. Like. Little. Kids.
Seems like next week is the “secret” the lolis have been hiding. Maybe they’re hiding toys?