Shigatsu wa Kimi no Uso 20 – 21
Tsubaki tries to get her feelings across
Getting close to the end on Shigatsu. Part of me is disappointed, part of me is glad. It’s a show that is trying but has moments that are very nice
Facing Losses
Continuing to feel like the 3rd wheel on a bicycle
Episode 20 decided it was going to be the emotional roller coaster episode. Mixing scenes from Kousei’s past, mostly memories with Tsubaki, with Kousei’s present where he’s trying to decide whether he’s going to be honest about his feelings for Kaori, it gives us a nice bit of continuity with Tsubaki from the past to the present, where they pass a lemonade back and forth, using it to cheer each other up. This leads up to the current time with Tsubaki trying to figure out how to say anything to Kousei. The way she eventually picks to kinda sorta confess ended up being pretty roundabout, first confirming that Kousei likes Kaori, then berating him about Watari and Kaori being a couple, even though if you asked Watari (the only person in this whole show who’s honest with themself) he’d easily say that Kaori and Kousei are the OTP there. I really do think that Watari goes and hangs out with Kaori because she needs someone to hang out with. Sure she’s pretty and funny, and fun to talk with, but he’s just being a friend, something that Kousei and Tsubaki have a really hard time doing.
Tsubaki ruins the mood
But Tsubaki misunderstands their relationship as well, or at least wants it to be so, so that Kousei is stuck with her. I really didn’t like this way she somewhat puts herself down, the default choice, not the one that Kousei SHOULD be with. And then after a confession like that, she ruins it further with kicking Kousei and running off. I know that she’s only 15, so this isn’t exactly out of character, but it is ineffective as far as getting a guy to like you.
Really? You had to go there?
Unfortunately for Kousei, Kaori’s still playing the arm’s-length romance thing as well, sending completely mixed messages to Kousei about visiting her, what she wants him to do, telling him to not visit because he needs to practice and then calling him to talk about the sky. And finally something happens between Kousei and Watari, where Kousei finally tells Watari what Watari already knows. And Kousei’s finally gotten up the nerve to tell Kaori about his feelings, but the show’s not done pulling the rug out from under him, with a sudden medical emergency, and then to pile on further, has the neighborhood black cat, which I think everyone realizes (including Kousei) is his kitten Chelsea, get run over and die. Geez, we get it already…
Recovery and Reaching
Hiroko just doesn’t know what she can do
After the emotional beatdown that Kousei gets from Kaori’s crash and the cat’s death, he feels like he’s not really in any shape to play in his competition, even though it’s the thing that will determine his future. But Tsubaki knows that she’s not the one who can pull him out of it, unlike the first time they got him on stage with Kaori. But for Hiroko, this is just calling back to her previous memory of Kousei breaking down after his mom’s death. She knows what’s at stake, but she also understands how much he’s been battered. Even if Tsubaki asked, she can’t really do anything.
Is this her own confession?
And in the middle of this storm, he gets another message from Kaori, who is back out of the ICU. And even though Kousei goes to visit her, it has a feeling of pretending that things are ok, when he knows they aren’t. He’s sure that this is just a slight pause on the downward slide of losing the things he cares about. But Kaori surprises him a little with her operation (conveniently on the same day as the competition), and that she’s going to struggle on. I wish that she had said the things she said in her head, that she wants to cling to the moments she spends with him, that he is the reason she wants to continue living, out loud, so that Kousei could hear them. She wants to know all about him, she envies Tsubaki for knowing him so well, but I wish she could plainly say how much she likes him. But maybe they’re both getting to the point where they realize the other person likes them. One can only hope.
Or is it more here?
But can Kousei still perform? He says that he’s out of practice, but a week? Really? That’s a short rest. He’s got a day or so. He could get back in ‘shape’ easily. And when the performance comes, he’s a lot more focused on the mental side, to the point of Emi and Takeshi needing to help him up. But is Hiroko mistaking Kousei’s current mental state? It seems more that he’s fighting his memories of Kaori and her desire for him to play against his memories of his mother and the things he’s lost. Thankfully, Tsubaki interrupts his reverie at the right time with something recognizable, and he realizes that he hasn’t lost everything. There are so many more people in his life, and he’s finally realizing that.
I don’t know if they’ll continue Kousei’s performance in the final episode, or if seeing him play this episode is going to be enough. As Hiroko hinted, this is more about whether he’ll even continue to be a pianist at this point. But he seems to have gotten over that, and is playing with his heart for the people that have filled his heart, finally realizing that they are there for him. Now that the show’s set up this possible happy ending, I really hope that it follows through. It would be a bit of dirty pool for it to go ahead and off Kaori after her operation. It is kind of odd, tho: They’ve been saying that this competition will decide who gets to stay in Japan and who goes to Europe. Yet at the beginning of the series, going to Europe was supposedly the goal that Kousei’s mom was drilling into him. It seems like a weird reversal, or is it that the goal has changed from ‘Europe’ to ‘love’?
About Highway
Proving that you don't have to be young to love anime, I enjoy all genres and styles of shows. If it's not hurting anyone else, you should never be ashamed of what you like!
POWUH: and LOLi Defender with 10998 comments
Well there is another point missed by some of the key players of the show. Kaori encourages Kousei to play through all the pain, even when he is ready to collapse. It’s what musicians do. But, it’s what people do as well.
I have to agree, this show only needs a trowel at the best of times. But they use a shovel with delusions of back-hoe when they only need that tiny layer of verisimilitude. Or they are just too anxious over that joker in a trump hand….
Well, you point out a frustration in Tsubaki. And yes, teenagers do act like that. I thought that was actually a great piece of writing, and a great performance as well. It felt very true.
Oh, holy crap. I hope spring means renewal for this show….
POWUH: 800-899 and Flying Sage with 856 comments
It will be interesting to see if they can wrap this up decently. I wouldn’t say this was the series I wanted to watch, but it was attractively packaged, and it met my minimum requirements of taking the music seriously. We don’t get a major musical performance with every episode, but we did get extended performances every couple of episodes.. Bring on the final episode!
POWUH: 900-999 with 915 comments
Er… I guess the black cat only represents Chelsea. Their eyes are different after all.
But, oh yeah. So many stuff happened and I’m talking about the cat. Still, STOP KILLING FUC*ING CATS! THAT’S THE THIRD IN LESS THAN A YEAR! STOP! I CAN’T T.T
So… Yeah. I guess Kaori couldn’t say everything she had on her mind because she’s still scared she won’t survive. Telling someone that he’s important to her only to die would be awful for this person, she probably knows about that.
Oh god, next week is the last spurt… I’m waiting on the line for the emotional rollercoaster.
POWUH: Meta Resident with 1692 comments
This show has loved putting Kousei through the emotional wringer so much that it should be called Kick Kousei in the Teeth. Really, on top of everything else they had to kill the cat?
I have no idea if they’ll kill off Kaori or not. Even if they do, while Kousei will grieve I think now he’ll be able to continue on with his life and his music rather than collapse into the depths like he did with his mother’s death. He’s learned that life must still go on and there are still other people who care for him and for whom he can play. Not just people he knows, but the strangers in the audience who came to hear him.
POWUH: Meta Team and PreCure Mastah with 9203 comments
With the manga being finished for some time now which no I have not started reading, but I fully expect Kousei to “win” and sadly it does not look like Kaori will survive! I just have a feeling as Kousei wraps up his song the surgery will finish at the same time with poor results…
I know that sounds horribly screwed up! Honestly I don’t really want it to happen that way and just in case anyone feels the need to say it no I don’t have a cold heart trust me I really like Kaori a lot.
Yeah the final will be extremely sad and I wonder if the second half will include a time skip of the main cast in high school? I don’t really feel the need of a season two, but who knows I guess it could be all filler? Again I really have no idea how much of the manga the anime pulled from.
POWUH: Meta Resident with 1557 comments
I’ve been hesitating to watch these partly due to my fear of what is to come, but since the finale will be subbed soon, I decided to marathon these two.
I loved the scene in 20 where Kousei and Kaori are watching the plane in the sky, and then Kousei goes “It’s not about the time. I want to see you.” I teared up (a little) ^^
Waiting on the finale now (I’ve been avoiding the manga and spoilers diligently). That’ll determine if it joins my A-list of romance shows or if it’ll be relegated to the it-was-awesome-till-the-ending type shows.
But for sure this has been my favorite show hands down airing this season. Aldnoah.Zero S2 has unfortunately been lacking, after S1.